Hugo has a post up about the anti-feminist perspective of feminist men.

Anti-feminists assume several things about men in the feminist movement. Frequently, we’re labeled as “gay”. As any sociologist will tell you, “gay” is code for “not a real man”. To the anti-feminists, “real men” (whom they assume are all heterosexual) could not possibly embrace an ideology of radical gender justice.

Of course, if we do seem to be happily hetero, the attack shifts: we’re sexual predators, wolves in sheep’s clothing, using feminism as a tool to seduce vulnerable young women. Our feminism isn’t real, merely a facade.

If we’re married to a woman and evidently monogamous — and still committed to feminism — then we must be “whipped.” Sometimes I think folks hear me say “I’m in a passionately feminist marriage” and they imagine that I’m married to an emasculating tyrant who only stays with me because I’m her sniveling “yes” man! That’s certainly YM’s implication when she riffs about my following the “party line.”

This post struck home for me. I know men that are feminist, and was horrified the first time one of my dear friends was accused of being a sexual predator using his ‘feminism’ and his position of power to get laid. I reacted with a considerable amount of fury, and told the speaker not to ever utter that kind of crap in my presence again. It just never occurred to me that people can see it that way, and now to realise that its actually a common bit of crap slung about disturbs me. I have had a guy try to ‘fake feminism’ to get me into bed. It was amusing, and hopelessly transparent. I think that it is pretty easy to tell if someone is ‘faking it’ to get you into bed.

I hate that people think so little of men.
I get accused of man hating on a fairly regular basis… the whine of “I feel like you hate me, like you are lumping me in with NiceGuys(tm) and all the other arseholes out there” drives me nuts, and tends to come up in most new friendships with men that aren’t actively feminist. I’m not the one that says that men can’t control their dicks, that they will lie and manipulate just to get a girl into bed, that they are just overgrown children that need looking after, that they shouldn’t be allowed near children cos they are all predators.

I think that societies structure needs to change to stop teaching these lessons to men and women, about their ‘place’ in life. I blame the patriarchy, not men. And yet, the ones that blame men, and suspect men of all manner of animalistic evil aren’t the ones accused of man-hating and misandry. Feminists are.