Cheerful Megalomaniac

A rant about Chauvinists

Posted by: Ryan on: December 30, 2007

So I am reading “Man Made Language” by Dale Spender, because I really ought to return it to the person that loaned it to me.

Its quite fabulous, and I am enjoying the first chapter, but while I was reading, I was reminded of an oft-quoted trope.

Why is it if a woman is sexist, she is a feminist, but if a man is sexist, he is a chauvinist pig?


Now then, that seems like a genuine question, and I really should have a look at the Feminism 101 FAQ to see what is said over there about that particular straw-feminist.

The question I would like to pose, is When was the last time anyone heard a man called chauvinist, and the person calling him that, not rebuffed?

When I call a man on sexist behaviour (even behaviour as serious as rape), I am almost always treated with censure. I get called a number of things. Harsh, unfair, rude, mean, bitchy, misandrist, militant, fucked-up, psychotic… the list goes on. (Yes, someone did actually call me psychotic cos I said that I thought women had a right to defend themselves from rapists. They were of the opinion that women should meekly submit to rape, and then let the police deal with it later.)

I have not actually heard a man called ‘chauvinist’… well, other than Hugh Heffner, but he doesn’t count being a celebrity. I have heard a woman called a ‘female chauvinist’ by a man that should have known better, simply because he was a lowly student, and she was the Director of a firm, and tore a strip out of him for including a sexist remark in his presentation. (He assumed he would be presenting to a male audience. Idiot.)

Calling a man ’sexist’ is actually considered a very serious charge. Its like calling a man a rapist, if he’s ‘only’ date raped people. If he didn’t beat her up too, then fuck, what are we whining about?

Calling a woman a man-hater, however, gets thrown about like there’s no tomorrow. I’m tired of it. Maybe its cos I have turned nocturnal, so I haven’t actually had human contact for a few days, but I feel kind of grumpy, and ranty… and MISANDRIST even.

Men have so many privileges, they don’t even realise that they have. I got a ‘Closed Door Meeting’ at work for saying in an ‘aggressive tone’ that I didn’t think that my boss was doing his job. Meanwhile, a male colleague threw a tantrum, and threw stock across the shop-floor in his temper, and the whole thing got ignored.

I have been molested, hit, slapped, punched, cut, bruised, attacked with a chain, groped, harassed, threatened and raped. All by men. Tell me again about how men are more likely to be the victims of violent crime, I really fuckin’ love that story.

So, yeah, sometimes I am a little aggressive. A bit ‘mean’, a bit ‘harsh’, a bit of a ‘bitch’.
I don’t hate every man. My current boss has told me I am not to put up with the least bit of bad behaviour, and has even accompanied me on a job because he suspected the academic was being rude to me.
I love and adore some of the men in my life, because they are loyal, and stick by me. Those men are PEOPLE, not pre-programmed drones, mindlessly serving the patriarchy. (ZOMG, idea for a sci-fi feminist comic blockbuster!)

People that tell me feminists are whining about nothing, and being ’silly’ make me angry.

(Also, I just KNOW someone is going to ‘resent’ that I called him a ‘preprogrammed drone, mindlessly serving the patriarchy’. So, if you jump to that conclusion, yeah, fuck it, I AM TALKING ABOUT YOU.)

7 Responses to "A rant about Chauvinists"

When I call a man on sexist behaviour (even behaviour as serious as rape), I am almost always treated with censure. I get called a number of things. Harsh, unfair, rude, mean, bitchy, misandrist, militant, fucked-up, psychotic… the list goes on. (Yes, someone did actually call me psychotic cos I said that I thought women had a right to defend themselves from rapists. They were of the opinion that women should meekly submit to rape, and then let the police deal with it later.)

You’re right, it’s a double standard. Then again, if it weren’t, there’d be no need for feminists…

One thing which is similar which I see from certain radfems on teh interwebz is the tendency to say “Men do X”, when X is something appalling and horrible. Yes, some men do that, but not all men, and to say it as a blanket statement like that tars us all with the same brush, and that’s wrong. I wouldn’t tolerate that kind of thing if a man said it about women, so I don’t see why I should let it go from women, either.

Sorry, rant and comment derailment over.

Hi Mike!
Thanks for reading my blog.
Now, something that I would like to point out… you will notice I said “A MAN” not “MEN”.
I’m not tarring all you dudes with the same brush when I get called a psychotic bitch, I am tarring one man with a very specific brush.

Sorry, yes, I should’ve been clearer there: I don’t think you do that. It just seemed relevant in context. My blood was up and I sometimes leave bits out when that happens. Muchoes sorriez.

You seem rational and fair, which is a Good Thing™.

lol
Glad you think I am rational and fair. ;)

Its the same, when my blood gets up, I tend to head off into Ranstville, across the state border of Irrelevancy.

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Your experiences isn’t everyone’s experience. Take the experience of a man whom, after two decades in prison is revealed by DNA to have been innocent of the rape a woman accused him of committing. Consider that the numbers of men found innocent is increasing everyday and that Feminist are mysteriously silent about their roles supporting women whom sometimes make these false charges.
Feminist will usually dismiss these horrendous miscarriages of justice in the name of settling old patriarchy scores, despite the fact that the man in question was innocent of the specific crime of rape.
Like patriarchy, many feminist use rape to manifest an impression that’s synonomous with the identity of males. Rape is a crime, of course and I do not condone it on any level. That said, I also do not condone the concept that only women are the subjects of gender crimes. Unlike Feminist ideology, I observe that women are just as culpable as some men in social relationships.

No man should accept being called a sexist when it isn’t true anymore than a woman should accept being defined as a bitch by definition. Innocent Men suffer the loss of family reputation and family when a false charge is levelled, and contrary to the impression some feminist will present, I have witnessed many occasions when fine gentlemen have had their lives upended on the implied idea that he might have said something untoward about or to a woman.

Bdesides no sane man actually thinks a woman ought to submit to rape, that’s just silly. However if a man has a different opinion about gender issues, then he’s automatically pro-rapist. And yes, I’ve recently heard a whole room full of men called a chauvanist by a feminist poet that had no problem castigating men she didn’t know. Also the word chauvinist is thrown about a lot in women’s study courses.
As far as sexist remarks, just watch any number of TV shows, mostly sitcoms and it seems that every other line given to female characters is dedicated to demeaning gender remarks aimed exclusively at men. There’s even a TV commercial where men are literally defined as a horse’s ass, while the wife is, of course a thinking, sensible, human being. If men exhibited any of these traits even suggestively, then the wrath of feminist protest will descend along with calls for sponsor boycotts.

Lastly, men aren’t privileged. That’s a myth. Most men struggle everyday to earn a living. If you’ve ever spent time in divorce or family court, you will discover being a man is more liability than privilege. In these matters men have virtually no equal rights when it comes to custody or settlement. The assertion that men do is borne out of distorted concepts based on constantly assuming what the identity of most men are like

Hi Adam,

Thank you for your response to my post.
I do not agree with you, and would like to address your arguments point by point. I will dedicate an entire post to the issue, in fact!
:)

I’ll let you know when it is up.

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